“The Brain In Love” by Benedict Carrey Summary and Response

In the essay “The Brain In Love” by Benedict, Carrey explores how biology plays within romantic attraction development through multiple scientific studies and experiments. Carrey claims romantic interest is based on our primal instinct, such as other basic needs similar to eating and sleeping. The feeling of romantic attraction develops from the biological need to find a mate; a person fulfills this need by focusing on choosing one person who satisfies our physical and personal requirements as a partner. Recent studies demonstrated the connection between biology and the formation of romantic attraction through MRI machines being used to allow scientists to view particular brain activity while experiencing this emotion. The results showed that neurological changes within the brain as higher dopamine concentrations were found after subjects viewed their partner’s photo versus their close friend. Dopamine receptors are responsible for feelings of euphoria and addiction and lead to restlessness and “goal-oriented” behavior, causing people to do impulsive acts out of romantic attraction; as scientist Semir Zeke claims, “These were young people who were practically willing to die for their lover (Carrey,401)”. Romantic interest affects our brains, causing people to make reckless decisions due to the brain “seeking” validation from the partner and releasing dopamine. 

 Carrey discusses the idea of romantic attraction being a drug for the mind as one judgment can become complaisant. The brain’s continuous addiction to validation encourages the behavior of idealization. People will make exceptions to detrimental actions due to the “pink lens effect,” as individuals believe their partners can not do wrong and create excuses for the behavior. But idealization is a crucial aspect of having a successful relationship. Idealizing one’s partner allows the person to see past one’s flaws during moments of conflict within the relationship. Studies showed that couples who romanticized their relationship could see the benefits of the relationship and stayed together through difficult times to create their “ideal relationship.” The study’s head researcher Tom Hanker claims, “One person putting a good spin on the partner … People who tend to stay in relationships longer than those who can’t or don’t (Carrey, 403)”. Individuals will view their partners’ shortcomings positively, allowing them to ignore issues within the relationship quickly.  

Romantic attraction is such a potent emotion because it encompasses all aspects of human companionship and the need for social connection. Passionate relationships tend to advance faster as the couple looks past their differences and solely focused on relationships. Slow-moving couples took time to grow within their relationship due to not idealizing their partner.  But eventually, potency decreases as the drug-like effects of romantic passion will run out and lead to the end of the relationship. Carrey connects relationships starting with a lack of desire have a higher chance of being long term due to not being built on the fleeting emotion of passion as “Studies of dating and engaged couples find that feelings of passionate love and infatuation tend to fade quickly in the first year, and a year or two later often are all completely gone (404).” Romantic passion eventually, like any drug, loses its effectiveness causing the termination of that relationship leaving the person hurt and craving affection until the goes back to normal.

In my view, Benedict Carrey’s essay “The Brain In Love” relates to the literary texts we have read within our course by encapsulating the biological processes behind romantic attraction sequentially explains the erratic emotions and reckless behavior due to this feeling. Attraction can compel people to make individual decisions and influence actions they make about their lives. Romantic interest can lead individuals of all sexualities to experience the true meaning of love by creating meaningful memories and embarking on a lifelong journey of deep affection with a person. But romantic attraction can elicit people into making irresponsible choices and committing heinous crimes out of love. These emotions and actions are demonstrated through multiple literary characters experiencing romantic interest, regardless of the attraction was returned.

Carrey’s idea of romantic attraction affects a person’s judgment. The physical toll affection has on the mind connects to multiple literary works within this course. Nikolai Gogol’s short story “Nevsky Prospect”  perfectly demonstrates Carrey’s point of romantic attraction, altering people’s judgment by ignoring one’s damaging or counterproductive behavior of their romantic interest due to the ideal version they have created within their minds. Gogol’s character Pisharev began to develop this fantasy within his mind about the women’s personality based on their brief encounter on the street, believing this random person was beyond virtuous, referring to her as a  heavenly creature by asking himself, “but how to lose this divinity without even discovering to what holy place she had descended for a visit? (Gogol,253)” while following her. After the image Pisharev created began to fall apart as he realizes that the woman works at a brothel, Pisharev continued to view the random woman as elegant, rich, and virginal within his dreams since the women’s reality was too harsh for him. Carrey explains this exact behavior as the “pink lens effect” as “psychologists have demonstrated in several studies, newly smitten lovers often idealize their partner, magnifying the other’s virtues and explaining away their flaws (403)”. Even though Pisharev applied this “pink lens effect” to a random woman rather than a lover, the romantic attraction Pisharev developed enabled him from being able to differentiate the women Pisharev wanted her to be versus the woman she was. 

Romantic attraction is also presented as a physical affliction that has adverse effects on the mind and body. Carrey discusses romantic attraction’s biological impact on the body as the drug-like feeling of attraction causes the brain to activate dopamine receptors, causing the sense of  “euphoria, craving, and addiction (402)”. The high concentration dopamine released with the body causes feelings of less need for food or sleep, hyperactivity, and restlessness. The symptoms mentioned relating to the sense of romantic attraction also relate to feeling lovesickness. Lovesickness was used throughout romantic literary works and was once considered the medical phenomenon of experiencing unrequited love causing irregular pulse, insomnia, lack of appetite, and insomnia. Various characters within our readings have demonstrated these symptoms; for example, Mikhail Lermontov’s novel “A Hero Within Our Time” shows the effects of unrequited love through Princess Mary. Mary became madly in love with Pechorin but fell deathly ill after Pechorin declared he did not have romantic feelings for her. Princess Mary’s mother describes her condition to Pechorin as “’But she is ill, and I am certain that it is no ordinary illness! A secret sorrow is killing her s.he does not admit it, but I am certain that you are its cause….(Lermontov, 160)”. Lermontov and Carrey connect on romantic affection, whether received by another or not, severely affects the body function. 

In essence, Benedict Carrey ideas of the biological processes involved with romantic attraction and how the processes affect our behavior and emotional state. Romantic Attraction can cause a range of emotions with people and lead to unhealthy and healthy behavior. Even though this vital emotion has been depicted through art and media throughout time there are scientific aspects to human emotion.